If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence you tried.
Never hit a guy with glasses. Always use your fists.
The only time I open my mouth is to change feet.
Happiness can't buy money.
True friends always stab you in the front.
There is more to life than increasing its speed.
Never advise anyone to go to war or to marry.
The meek shall inherit the Earth after we're done with it.
A coward is a hero with a wife, kids and a mortgage.
Skydiving - Good to the last drop.
A penny saved is a congressional oversight.
An elephant is a mouse built to government specifications.
Those who live by the sword get shot by those who don't.
Forgive your enemies, but remember their names.
