Life isn't fair to men.
When we are born, our mothers get the compliments and the flowers.
When we are married, our brides get the presents and the publicity.
When we die, our widows get the life insurance.
What do women want to be liberating from?
The average man's life consists of -
Twenty years of having his mother ask him where he is going;
Forty years his wife asking the same question;
And at the end, the mourners wondering too
A Man was walking down a street when he heard a voice from behind:
'You take one more step; brick will fall down on your head and kill you.'
The man stopped and a big brick fell right in front of him.
The man was astonished. He went off, and after a while he was about to cross the road.
Once again the voice shouted: 'Stop! Stand still! If you take one more step a car will run over you, and you will die.'
The man did as he was instructed; car came with a very high speed around the corner, barely missing him.
'Who are you, where are you?' the man asked.
'I am your Guardian Angel' the voice answered.
'Oh, yeah?' the man asked. 'And where were you when I got married?!'