Wednesday, July 07, 2004

Great Laws

Terman's Law of Innovation:
If you want a team to win the high jump, you find one person who can jump seven feet, not seven people who can jump one foot each.

O'brien's Variation:
If you change queues, the one you have left will start to move faster than the one you are in now.

Conway's Law:
In any organization there will always be one person who knows what is going on. This person must be fired.

Lieberman's Law:
Everbody lies; but it doesn't matter since nobody listens.

Kovac's Conundrum:
When you dial a wrong number,you never get an engaged one.

Van Herpen's Law:
The solving of the problem lies in finding the solvers.

Murphy's Law of Government:
If anything can go wrong, it will do so in triplicate.

Bell's Theorem:
When the body is immersed in water, the telephone rings.

Ruby's Principle of Close Encounters:
The probability of meeting someone you know increases when you are with someone you don't want to be seen with.

Young's Law:
Great discoveries are made by mistake.

Kin Hubbard's Law:
A good listener is usually thinking about something else

Lorenz's Law of Mechanical Repair:
After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch.

Anthony's Law of the Workshop:
Any tool, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner.

Beach's Law:
Interchangeable parts aren't.

William's Law:
There is no mechanical problem so difficult that it cannot be solved by brute strength and ignorance.

Lane's Law of Supply and Demand:
The one item you need is always in short supply.

Cannon's Karmic Law:
If you tell the boss you were late for work because you had a flat tire, the next morning you will have a flat tire.

Norman Einstein's Law:
If it's stupid but it works,it isn't stupid.

Col. Murphy's Law of Combat:
Never forget that your weapon was made by the lowest bidder